Gather Round for the Duck’s Ducket List

Everyone has goals in life, right?  Some call them dreams.  But, whatever you call them, everyone has these certain special things they want to accomplish in life.  The duck is no exception.  My goals or dreams, whichever, include some things that are very unrealistic, some bizarre, and some that are a bit too simplistic to count as actual goals.  Nevertheless, I thought I’d list here my current list of things I want to do before I become a fluffy, chewy, duck ghost.  A ducket list.

            1. Eat a soufflé, preferably cheese or chocolate.  Or both, but not in the same soufflé.  I mean, spread out over two soufflés.  As you may have guessed, this is one of my very unrealistic goals.  Eat a soufflé, you say, duck?  You may as well wish to go to the moon, another feat never accomplished by human nor duck kind.  (I mean, seriously, it’s like a good, 100, 200 miles away.)  I know, I know, soufflés are that mythical food that are very difficult to make and only stay good a short time.  But, I want to eat one someday.  (Actually, after typing this post, but before posting it, I did make some soufflés, after all.  A cheese one and a chocolate one.  They turned out to be surprisingly easy to make, though the cheese one was tasteless.  The chocolate one was good, though.  Anything chocolate is good.  I just decided to keep my soufflé rant, despite accomplishing this goal.)

            2. Play creepy music on an organ during a bad thunderstorm.  Or at least, play creepy music on the piano, if an organ can’t be found.  Though, I would certainly prefer an organ.  A really monstrous one.  And then I’d play the organ music from the Mad MonsterMansion church in “Banjo-Kazooie” or perhaps the music from “The Ghost and Mr. Chicken” (now I want to watch that movie again, oh the guy that play Barney Fife, you’re so funny).  With thunder in the background, it would be awesome, like a real-life spooky movie.  Do you think a church would let me?  I must visit my local Catholic church and see what they say.  I hope it’s okay I’m a Presbyterian….

            3. Publish something.  Something.  Something!  Anything!  Just publish something!  Oh, my gosh, this is the soufflé dream all over again!  It’ll never happen!  Especially since lately, I’ve been writing nothing but fan fiction.  Don’t think the publishers will take that.

            4. Like goal number one, I actually did this one, too, but it was a goal for so long, I must list it.  Play “Final Fantasy VII”.  It was the main game I wanted to play, and I finally did it.  It was awesome.

            5. And also, catch up on some other old games.  Old “Zelda” games, “Metroid”.  “Earthbound”, “Chrono Cross” and “Trigger”, the good “Spyro” ones, plus “Final Fantasy” games I missed (specifically “VI”, “VIII”, and “IX”.)  This is easily accomplished if I’d get off my butt and actually procure them.  But, you know how it is, once you order it from Amazon, it takes like a week to show up, and I just don’t know if I can wait that long.

            6. Have one of my posts Freshly Pressed by WordPress.  Come on, already, press it freshly!

            7. Become a top reviewer on Amazon.  Okay, I gave up on this one, and it was a dumb goal anyway.  I just thought it would be neat to be the best reviewer in the whole, wide world.  But, then I got bored of writing reviews, and no one would click that it was helpful.  They seemed bent on clicking unhelpful as of late, undermining all my hard work.  And I have other things to do and no longer have the time to write reviews that will simply be marked as not helpful.  I nearly broke the 100,000 mark, which wasn’t bad, seeing as I started out on 1,500,000.  But, alas, it shan’t ever come true.

            8. Sell prints of my art.  That would be neat.  Just like publishing something would be neat.  Or eating a soufflé.  This one might come true.  I could print out some with relative ease.  Then harass people until they purchase it.  Or bribe them with soufflés.  Or play scary organ music at them until they relent.  So many means to reaching this goal.  Which one shall I take?

            9. Have a booth at a comic convention.  It would be awesome to show off my work at a convention and sell stuff.  Once again, using the methods as described above.  I’m sure I can at least have a booth.  They can’t stop that if I wave a nice one dollar bill under their noses.  Or even some brownies.  Mmmm, brownies.  With schmellows on top.  So yeah, that’s my goal, as actually selling something from that booth is highly unlikely, and I’d have to be an absolute nutter to think anyone would buy any of my stuff without a great deal of force involved.

            10. Watch “Soylent Green”.  I already know it’s made of people, but I never saw the movie, so I must.  Come on, Netflix.  Have it!  Have it, darn you!  It’s impossible to get movies when you want anymore because stupid Blockbuster doesn’t have stores anymore!  Plus, I hate paying for stuff if there are free options.  (You hear that, WordPress, you’re never getting a cent from me.)  I should check Youtube, perhaps.

            So I think a list of ten is good.  I can always add more later.  What are your goals in life, whether they be the whimsical, the impossible, or the actually realistic and logical?

Soylent Duck, It’s Made of Corn Dogs, the Horrors!

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4 thoughts on “Gather Round for the Duck’s Ducket List

  1. Interesting list Duck of Indeed. In regards to the fan fiction, there was a young author (can’t for the life of me remember her name) not too long ago who became published, and afterwards she had all of her fan fiction released in published format after she altered the names of the characters. I guess I’m trying to say that publishers perhaps will go for fan fiction in some cases.
    BTW, just a thought – this post seems a tad bit negative Duck of Indeed. There will always be people who will tell you that your dreams are hopelessly intangible and that you will fail at everything; you needn’t add fuel to the fire of negativity – if you attempt to maintain positivity, then your chances of a better outcome are accentuated. Forgive the cliche, but you gotta be in it to win it!
    Also, on a side note, and this is personal so you needn’t answer, but, are you a guy duck or a girl duck? I feel kinda odd referring to you as a ‘Duck’ and depending on your gender I can then refer to you as ‘Sir’ or ‘Ma’am’ which will not seem so out of place – unless you really are a duck, then I guess this is just fine.
    Again, interesting list Duck of Indeed.
    Good luck with your future exploits!

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    1. Yes, perhaps there is hope for my fan fiction, after all. And you know what’s odd, I’ve seen fan art for sale at comicons. I don’t know how they can get away with that, but perhaps there are more things that can be done with fan-made stuff than I first thought. And yes, I should be more positive. At the very least, I don’t want to jinx myself. Who knows, maybe I will be successful someday, after all. I’ll just have to wait and see.

      And I’m a lady duck.

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  2. I’ve tried my hand at souffle making before — they’ve mostly turned out okay or barely edible. The sweet ones, like your chocolate one, always seem to come out better. Savory ones tend to taste like egg-flavored air. I mean, I know they are supposed to be delicate, but jeez.

    And y’know, people buy lots of fun stuff at conventions, and I don’t think your work would be out of place at all. Besides, brownies? People would have to buy stuff if you offered free brownies. That’s just the way the world works….or…the way it should work.

    FFVII is still on my bucket list. I’m no longer thinking “someday” with the backlog, but rather “when the right time comes.” It’s very freeing…and still a little frustrating, But mostly freeing.

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    1. It did indeed taste like egg-flavored air. The chocolate one turned out more like a brownie, mousse thing, but I also added extra chocolate, after the tastelessness of the cheese one. And maybe people will buy my things at the convention. And if things are going slow, I’ll turn to bribery. Bribery is good. And I know someday you’ll finish “FFVII”. I had one game I couldn’t beat, and I finally returned to it about 8 years later and finished it. It took a while, but at least it happened eventually.

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